By Kristen Nagle

I was miserable in this picture. I knew it was a lie and it was killing my soul. I’d say it was the beginning of the end for me, but really it started well before that moment, that was just the catalyst I needed to make a change.

Our nursing union spent years fighting for us to not have to wear a mask during “flu season” if we did not receive an annual flu shot. Our unions finally won — proving that masks were discriminatory and did not stop transmission of viruses. But here we were — forgetting the years we had fought for this decision, forgetting science and succumbing to fear. I hadn’t forgotten. I was not going to let fear take over — I learned this lesson already with injections, and my son, Logan. I let fear win and said yes to shots I wasn’t comfortable with. I promised myself I’d never let fear win again. Plus, I’ve never been one to go along with something that just doesn’t make sense and goes against all logical thinking. Nothing that was happening in 2020 felt right, I sensed it to my core.

I began to feel ostracized, bullied and isolated at work, partially by my own doing as I couldn’t relate to the conversations happening and no one wanted to hear my thoughts on the matter. This wasn’t the first time I felt this way. As I began to question the medical establishment I became used to feeling this way, the treatment received from colleagues and the distant relationships.

I became a nurse to help people, to make a difference in one’s life, to do good (the salary, ability to travel, and steady employment with benefits were all very nice perks). I love learning and soaked in all the information that was taught to us, trusting in it, believing in it, embodying it.

Until my first son redirected my path and I enrolled at the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition. It was here that I learned about true health and wellness and actually healing. Health was so easy! Why weren’t we teaching this? Why weren’t we being taught any of this in nursing school? Why wasn’t anyone in the medical community talking about this!?

We are here to help people to provide actual care, to make a difference. It no longer began to look that way. The more I began to question, the more pushback I received. This is not what I signed up for.

My soul was being crushed, but I didn’t know what to do. I kept showing up and loving my patients, the parents, the relationships I was making. While at home trying to educate and bring awareness about true health to anyone willing and wanting to listen.

When I’m passionate about something I dive full in, completely consumed in more knowledge! I don’t do anything halfway.

The veil had been lifted and nursing no longer was what it once was to me when I started. I tried to start up other businesses, dabbled in entrepreneurship and looked for other options. At the end of the day I was captive to the steady pay, flexible shifts and 14 years of knowing the job. Change can be hard.

2020 came and this was it. My line in the sand. I could not participate in such a massive lie on so many levels that was causing immense harm to those around me. Aren’t we supposed to speak up for the vulnerable? Protect the public? Follow the four core ethical principles of nursing; autonomy, beneficence, justice, and non-maleficence. What is happening here? Why are 6 year olds trying to commit suicide?

The hardest part was staying silent. Speaking the truth was easy. The consequences that came from that were immense and still ongoing currently, but also a huge blessing. It led to a suspension, internal investigation with the College of Nurses and eventually my termination. All bridges had been burned. God made sure there was no turning back for me. I had asked to exit for years, this just wasn’t how I imagined it. He knew I wasn’t strong enough in my flesh and made sure there was no option of returning. He had other plans for me.

www.KristenNagle.com