Absurdity Observer April 2024


Illustration by annecantstandit.com

Absurdity Observer – April 2024

  • WeightWatchers has issued an apology to its customers, admitting they “got it wrong” in the past when they said weight is a matter of diet and lifestyle. In a strategic shift, the company now plans to incorporate weight-loss medications such as Ozempic into their plan.
  • Over 140,000 US farms were lost in just five years. Between 2017 and 2022, the number of farms in the US declined by 141,733, or 7% —an area loss equivalent to the size of the state of Maine. Meanwhile, in that same amount of time, insect protein and lab-grown meat investor Bill Gates became the largest private owner of farmland in the US, currently owning over 270,000 acres across 18 states.
  • In the ongoing landmark fluoride trial—that seeks to prohibit the addition of fluoride to water in the US—an Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) risk assessor admitted under oath that fluoride is neurotoxic even at relatively low levels. Furthermore, the agency’s key expert witness on fluoride’s neurotoxicity conceded to serious flaws in his own study.
  • In possibly a new record, after a FOIA request by the Epoch Times, the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) released their 148-page report on myocarditis after COVID-19 mRNA vaccination—it is completely blank due to a full redaction of absolutely everything it contains.
  • Was “long COVID” just a fad? Australian Chief Health Officer Dr. John Gerrard says a scientific study proves “long COVID” doesn’t exist. One of Australia’s leading doctors urges everyone to refrain from using the term “long COVID” following a new study that found the long-term effects of the coronavirus are no different from those of other viruses. The study, conducted by Queensland Health, examined 5,000 Queenslanders and found that adults who tested positive for COVID did not experience an increased rate of “long-COVID”-like symptoms compared to those who had the flu or a cold.
  • Dengue fever has spiked fourfold in Brazil following the release of millions of gene-edited mosquitos by the United Nations’ World Mosquito Program. In the first five weeks of 2024, over 364,000 cases of dengue infection have been reported—four times greater than previous cases in the same period in 2023. The dramatic spike in dengue cases has prompted Brazil to purchase millions of doses of the dengue vaccine.
  • Electric vehicles (EVs) release more toxic particles into the atmosphere and are worse for the environment than their gas-powered counterparts, according to a resurfaced study recently highlighted by the Wall Street Journal (bit.ly/3TpCu01). According to Emission Analytics, who conducted the study, modern cars have improved in cleanliness so much that most vehicle-related pollution while driving actually comes from tire wear. The study found that EV tires and brakes, with their significantly heavier load, release 1,850 times more particle pollution compared to modern tailpipes, which have “efficient” exhaust filters.
  • A new whistleblower video shows Pfizer’s principal scientist admitting that the company skipped 10 years’ worth of safety testing and had significant knowledge of mRNA vaccine side effects, but released the COVID-19 jab anyway. Justin Leslie, a former Pfizer employee and whistleblower, released the video recording of a private conversation with Kanwal Gill, a principal scientist at Pfizer, online. Kanwal also talked about how they had been attempting to market vaccine mRNA technology for 50 years, but due to side effects, were not able to do so until the company used the pandemic to bring mRNA vaccines to market.
  • When CTV News asked Ontario Premier Doug Ford about what he learned from the pandemic four years later, he responded with: “I think we did extremely well compared to the rest of the world.” Reminder: Ford implemented a province-wide vaccine passport system that compelled businesses to restrict unvaccinated patrons in places like restaurants, sporting events, and movie theatres or face steep fines. His government also strongly advocated for a six-foot social distancing measure that, in turn, appeared to greatly financially benefit to his labelling company, Deco Labels.
  • For years, people who believed COVID was like a bad cold or flu were called “conspiracy theorists.” Now, the CDC has issued new isolation guidelines for COVID-19 that are in line with the flu and other viral respiratory illnesses.
  • FDA Chief Dr. Peter Marks acknowledges that the “avalanche of reports was tremendous,” referring to adverse event reports from the COVID-19 vaccines. As noted during the hearing by the Select Subcommittee on the Coronavirus Pandemic, as of February 2024, Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System (VAERS) reports for COVID-19 vaccines total significantly higher than all other vaccines combined since 1990.
  • Goodfellas Wood Oven Pizza, with seven locations in Toronto, Ontario, is charging people a 2% carbon fee on all orders to fight climate change.
  • Despite a decline in viewership, the federal government pledged to give the CBC yet another $1.4 billion handout for the 2024-2025 fiscal year. In the 2022-2023 fiscal year, CBC received $1.3 billion from the federal government. The CEO also disclosed that the company paid out bonuses totalling $14.9 million in the same fiscal year. CBC fails to see their decline in viewership as being related to the lies they tell, instead claiming it is due to “news fatigue following two years of the COVID-19 crisis.”
  • COVID-19 lockdowns had high health and economic costs, study shows. A recent Swedish study published in the Economic Affairs Journal (Andersson & Jonung) found that Sweden’s less restrictive COVID-19 policies, in contrast to other European nations that imposed stronger lockdown rules, led to lower excess mortality. Sweden also suffered a lower negative impact on GDP growth during the COVID era.
  • After millions received mandated vaccinations in the name of protecting others, FDA Chief finally admits that the COVID-19 vaccines may not prevent transmission of disease. During a hearing with the Select Subcommittee on the Coronavirus Pandemic. FDA Chief of the Center for Biologics Evaluation and Research, Dr. Peter Marks claimed, “it may not prevent infection” as the data on transmission is “challenging to pin down.”
  • Of all media outlets, CTV News reports that Ontario Hospital staffing shortages could be due to COVID-19 vaccine mandates. Unions representing Ontario hospital workers continue to label the province’s staffing crisis as being at its “breaking point.”
  • France’s “Pfizer Amendment could potentially turn mRNA critics into criminals according to a highly-controversial law that was just pushed through the National Assembly. The draconian law aims to throw journalists who advise against the use of therapeutic or prophylactic treatment (including experimental mRNA gene therapy) into prison for up to three years and pay a hefty fine of 45,000 euros.
  • Regina, Saskatchewan’s oldest Catholic church, Blessed Sacrament, becomes the 100th vandalized church in Canada since 2021. Captured on video, the gas-carrying, mask-wearing arsonist was just one of a flurry of arsonists that have targeted churches following the residential schools’ mass graves announcement in 2021. Of the hundred countrywide church attacks, fourteen served congregations on Indian reserves, and eleven churches were hit on a single day in Calgary.