By Holly Simon 

I’ve spent years navigating a medical system that talks a lot about “equity” but practices something very different. 

And the truth is, if you’re a woman with a real, medically documented condition—but you have the “wrong” identity—your pain will be ignored, delayed, or outright dismissed. 

Here’s my story. 

I was born female and never questioned that identity. I’m what you’d call an old-school tomboy. I didn’t grow up collecting trendy labels—I just got on with things. I spoke plainly. I trusted doctors when I shouldn’t have. And I paid for that trust with years of pain. 

At 25 years old, I diagnosed myself with Nail-Patella Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder. I brought the evidence to doctors. I explained it. I asked for proper follow-up. 

And yet, it still took years, and even a detour through Nova Scotia, before anyone referred me to a genetics counselor. I wasn’t quickly routed through specialists. I wasn’t believed. It was a relentless, exhausting effort to be taken seriously. 

And while the system stalled, people around me didn’t hesitate to pile on. 

I was mocked, questioned, and even presumed to be transgender—all because of a congenital disorder I didn’t ask for. I was asked invasive questions about my body. My condition wasn’t just dismissed—it was weaponized. 

One of the syndrome’s symptoms is underdeveloped breast tissue—a medically documented physical trait. At the time, I didn’t fully understand how deep the double standards ran. 

But looking back now, after what I’ve learned and what I’ve been through, I realize something: If I asked for breast reconstruction today, I’d be denied. Not because it’s unnecessary, but because I don’t identify as something else. 

And I know this because of what happened next. 

In 2017, I began experiencing unrelenting pelvic pain. No unusual bleeding. No dramatic emergency. Just constant, worsening pain that affected everything. Even eating became difficult. It took over a year before anyone took it seriously. 

Eventually, I was approved for surgery. But before that surgery happened, in May 2018, in Corner Brook, Newfoundland, my gynecologist told me something that should never come out of a doctor’s mouth: “If you want MCP [Medical Care Plan] to approve a hysterectomy, you would need to identify as trans or non-binary.” 

That wasn’t a suggestion. That was a requirement.

And here’s the part that still hurts to say: I didn’t refuse. I couldn’t. I was in so much pain, I agreed.

That’s how bad it had gotten. 

The surgery went ahead. But they left my ovaries intact, despite everything I’d said. And afterward, I was told there was no endometriosis. I was sent home with no answers. 

But I knew better. I knew something had been missed. 

And here’s the part no one in Canada wants to talk about: To finally get help, I had to leave Newfoundland and go to Florida. 

In October 2021, I underwent a second surgery in Sarasota, Florida. 

And that’s when they found it. 

The endometriosis had been there all along. It was missed in Corner Brook, Newfoundland. I suffered three more years for no reason. I have the surgical photos to prove it.¹

And yet, Canada still dares to call its system “inclusive.” Inclusive of whom? 

Not me. Not biological women with inconvenient disorders. Not those who refuse to play identity politics to get basic care. I’m not asking for special treatment. 

I’m asking for equal treatment. 

If someone can get a taxpayer-funded phalloplasty, then I should be able to get reconstructive care for a documented birth defect. If someone can access a hysterectomy to affirm identity, I shouldn’t have to lie about mine just to escape pain. 

This isn’t about resentment. It’s about calling out a system that rewards performance and punishes truth. 

I didn’t lie. I didn’t posture. I told the truth and was punished for it. But I’m done being quiet. 

Because for every woman erased by this system, another one is coming behind her, confused, hurting, and being told to call herself something else just to be seen. 

You weren’t broken. The system is. And it’s time we told the truth. 

1. https://baymansparadox.com/Druthers

Holly Simon is a Newfoundland-born writer, advocate, and digital media professional. She is the founder of Bayman’s Paradox, a project that examines how global agendas infiltrate small communities through cultural dysfunction, narrative control, and the illusion of local consent.